Tuesday, 23 February 2010

Prop In a Frock?

Further to our earlier bulletin, investigations have continued into the disturbing incident in Batley.

News reaches the PFU the Mr Kylie Leuluai of the Leeds chapter was spotted at this here event at Batley Variety Club wearing ladies clothing and singing a song that should only be sung by a girl. This behaviour is a complete and utter disgrace and brings the good name of this Union into contempt. The Union will be seeking an explanation from Mr Leuluai at the earliest available opportunity. Others who are still under suspicion from events at this do are Richard Moore, Thomas Burgess, Garreth Carvell and Ewan Dowes. Investigations into this incident continue.

Whilst on the subject, we are delighted to receive the transfer papers from the UPFNZAI for Mr Joel Clinton who will be sponsored by the Hull (East) Chapter. His Union membership has also been proposed by Mr Adrian Morley, we still currently seek a seconder but it is expected that will be fulfilled shortly.

The PFU would also like to point out to members of the visiting Melbourne Storm squad that we will be monitoring their movements on behalf on the UPFNZAI whilst they are resident and playing in the United Kingdom. We at the PFU wish all our friends from Melbourne a pleasant stay on these shores.

Mr Alex Ferguson supports PFU boot policy

Been a pretty quiet weekend for the Union, but there have been some notable and disgraceful exceptions. First up is Mr Nicholas Scruton of the Bradford chapter. We appreciate that sometimes members are needed to score tries but it need to be done in the correct manner. To take the ball over 10 meters away from the line, sidestep and spin out of attempted tackles to bag said try is not acceptable conduct from a member of the union. There are two saving graces for Mr Scruton: a) the fact that the Castleford defenders clearly had better things to do than attempt a tackle worthy of the name and b) the traditional headware which he sported during the game. A fine example to younger members.

It has brought to out attention that Mr Craig Huby of the Castleford chapter has again bought shame and disrepute to the Union with his antics during the game on Friday night. Not happy with the level three kicking charge incurred the other week he compounded this by kicking the ball from hand, in a crossfield manner to create a try for a cheeky winger. We will be asking Mr Huby for a further significant donation to Union funds. There has also been a proposal for Mr Huby to be excluded from the Union but the way the lad is funding us at the moment it has been put on hold for now.

The Union is currently undertaking an investigation into claims that members were spotted at an event at Batley Variety club the other night. It is alleged that certain members were entertaining a large crowd with singing and dancing on stage. We are yet to confirm all members involved but the fingers are pointing at the previously mentioned Mr Scruton plus members from the Leeds, Hull (West) and Warrington chapters. There is also an allegation that some of the PFU Youth section are involved as well.

We note with interest with the comments made today by the manager of Manchester United Football Club, Mr Alex Ferguson, regarding footwear. He has stated that members of the youth team are not permitted to wear any colour boots other than black. We would like to remind members that the PFU operate a similar policy and any member found breaching this regulation will be asked to make a trip to explain their actions to the committee.

The committee would also like to express their delight at the tackle by Mr Adrian Morley on some fancy dan second rower at the weekend. Bought a tear to the Hon. Secretary's eye it did.

We would also like to repeat our appeal from weekend due to receiving minimal feedback. For any citings or sightings please leave a comment on here or contact the Chairman via Twitter.

And Burgess, we're watching you lad.

Friday, 19 February 2010

Unsporting conduct

Word reaches us from one of our spotters of some obscene prop-on-prop action from last weekend's Warrington v Castleford game. Garreth Carvell led with the elbow on Paul Jackson, seemingly oblivious of the PFU Code Of Conduct. While knocking folk about is one of the noble arts of prop forwardry that we, the union, seek to uphold, it's against the Brotherhood ethos for members to engage in it between themselves. So to the protagonist, we say: Sir, save your energies for noble pursuits such as twatting half-backs, fancy-dan wingers and anyone with a stupid haircut.
No fines will be issued, but a letter reminding Mr Carvell of his duties to his brothers in the union will be issued.

In other news:

Now the PFU is dipping it's tow in the waters of modern technology what with this 'ere webpage as well as going all a'Twitter, but a source tells us that we're not the first among brethren to jump on board these new toys. A source tells us that Luke Burgess "practically lives on Twitter" and that it's "all about his trips to bleedin' Nandos". Now we're all for encouraging the lad, but we're still trying to ascertain whether these new fangled gadgmos and gizgets are all that and we've yet to give proper approval. So calm down young Burgess.

Elsewhere, a member of the Bradford chapter has been putting his spare time to useful employ. Andy Lynch has made a great impression with his mickey taking of one of the members of the Association of Dummy Halves and Hookers (ADHH), namely one Wayne Godwin, by inventing 'Wagga's Wall of Fame' and features a number of lookalikes of Mr Godwin. Among these are though to be Carlos Tevez, Gordon Ramsay, David Gest, Simon Weston, Leatherface from the Texas Chainsaw Massacre films and Gollum. A fine use of your time, Mr Lynch.

Thursday, 18 February 2010


The Hon. Chairman wishes to make a please to the general Rugby League community. If we are to continue to hold up the virtues and values of Prop Forwarding we need you help.

We need you to report incidents and findings of any wrong doing by Prop Forwards in order for us to take action. You need to be on the look out for the following.....

Inappropriate coloured boots
Kicking the football
Non-Members impersonating Prop Forwards
Inappropriate try scoring (ie anything over 10 metres)
Multiple try scoring.
Being made to look a fool by a half back
Yellow and Red Cards

We also appreciate good play as well, so look out for

Big hits
Slapping cheeky half backs

Don't forget you can report things here by commenting or to the Hon. Chairman directly via Twitter

Here endeth the plea. I thank you.

Saturday, 13 February 2010

Charge Sheet 1

Ryan O'Hara (Crusaders) - Kicking the Football (Grade 1)
Incident took place during second half of Crusaders v Leeds Rhinos game. Friday 29th January 2010

Committee Findings: First Offence. The committee took into account that Mr O'Hara was placed into a bad position by the acting half back by being given the ball at first receiver on the last tackle. He was left with little to no option but to kick the ball. Mr O'Hara was given advice that in future he should look for the nearest half back before shaming the Union with such antics in the future.

Craig Huby (Castleford Tigers) - Kicking the Football (Grade 3)
Numerous incidents took place during the Leeds Rhinos v Castleford Tigers game. Friday 5th February 2010

Committee Findings: A serial offender and the committee are becoming sick of the sight of Mr Huby at these proceedings. Kicking for goal is bad enough behaviour (34th minute) but to be caught in the act of kicking the ball to restart the game (39th minute) and then a drop out from under the posts in the second half brings disrepute to this Union and will not be tolerated anymore. Mr Huby will be asked to contribute a significant sum to Union funds for these transgressions.

Richard Fletcher (Barrow Raiders) - Kicking the Football (Grade 1)
Two incidents during the Barrow Raiders v Blackpool Panthers game. Sunday 7th February

Committee Findings: Mr Fletcher was twice spotted taking attempts at goal during the above fixture. To compound this both attempts were successful. Mr Fletcher was warned to his future conduct and advised another appearance in front of this committee would be frowned upon.

Danny Stanley (Doncaster) - Kicking the Football (Grade 1)
Two incidents during Swinton Lions v Doncaster game. Sunday 7th February

Committee Findings: Mr Stanley was twice spotted taking attempts at goal during the above fixture. Mr Stanley, unlike Mr Fletcher, was not successful with either attempt. The committee warned Mr Stanley that this was unacceptable behaviour but in the light of the 0% success rate it was decided just to place the incident on record and take no further action at this time.

The Committee would also like to commend Stuart Dickens (Featherstone Rovers) for having his goal kicking duties removed.

You can report any findings to the Chairman via Twitter

New members

Huddersfield have put in applications for membership for Andy Raleigh and Danny Kirmond. Raleigh's application was accepted, but it's only two years since Kirmond was playing on the wing. He has a two-year probationary period to serve before full membership can be considered. We were pleased, however, by the promotion of another of the Fairbank family to the Huddersfield first team.

Our French cousins at the Catalan Dragons have applied to have Dane Carlaw's membership renewed. As a former Test prop, it was accepted, but with a warning that any repeat of him playing on the wing (Salford away in 2009, where he scored a try) will put this in jeopardy. Jamal Fakir has applied for a new membership and has proved that he's put on the requisite amount of weight. Membership accepted.

Other new members join us from our Australian counterparts - the Society of Front Rowers - for 2010. Mark O'Meley joins the Hull (West) chapter and Wakefield welcome Shane Tronc, although Joel Clinton's move to the Hull (East) chapter is still held up. All are welcome.