It's been a busy old time at PFU towers with some shameful behaviour by some of our members or in some cases non-members. Two of the committee have been hospitalised by some of the actions and we wish them a speedy recovery. The coronary unit at the local hospital may end up being our chosen charity the rate they have to treat committee members at the moment.
Anyway, onto business and it's a question of where to start.
First of all we start in the South of France. Very nice at this time of year I hear and plenty of sunshine and all that. It has been brought to our attention though that Paul King (Wakefield) whilst wearing white boots succeeded where Andrew Lynch failed back at Easter and slotted over a one pointer. What that bloody hell are you doing King? His defence said that he was left with no option as the ball found it's way to him on the last. You'll have to do better than that. Thou shalt not put boot to ball son but we'll accept cash or cheque.
Disturbing news that Huddersfield have been playing a unregistered member in the front row. Calls have been made to the Fartown shop steward but for some reason we haven't been able to get through. We hope that Graeme Horne either tips up here with his papers pretty damn quick or stops sticking his head in the front row. We were under the impression that this bugger were a poncey centre, what is this sport coming to?
After his efforts in London the other week straightening up that young upstart Krasniqi the committee would like to place on record their best wishes to Kylie Leuluai (Leeds) after his recent injury against the Crusaders. We'd also like to commend Mr Leuluai, despite being in obvious pain and about to be helped from the field he took the time to verbally berate the offender before being dragged off. We reckon if he'd have been within swinging distance fists may have been thrown. Better luck next time.
There has also been some concern raised over non-members impersonating members in order to form a quick scrum to get referee to stop clock. It has been noticed that a Sam Tomkins and Paul Wellens have both been in this situation recently. We would like to remind all shop stewards of their duty to remove such imposters from the scrum and let the real lads take over. So far, there's been no incident, but we're keeping a beady eye out.
The PFU Network gets ever wider as our new Agent Tellins has been in touch with footwear breaches from the visit of Salford to Knowsley Road t'other day. Must like the game this lad as he's snitched on two kids from th'academy game. Step forward Gareth Frodsham (Tellins) and Adam Neal (Salford). We are particularly disappointed with the actions of Mr Neal; as well as scoring a try in said game he's on loan from Warrington and has a great role model in the shape of Mr Morley and he should know better. Anyway, from the main game Tony Puletua, Nick Fozzard and Philip Leuluai were cited for footwear breaches.
We'd like to thank everyone who has been in touch with the Hon Chairman via twitter. Here's a selection of what we've received.
@ChrisMyers76 - Jamie Peacock (Leeds) white boots - and catching a ball that would have made Rob Green green with envy. - Just like to point out that we have no one by the name of Rob Green on the membership.
@elizhudson3 - I think I may have seen Danny Ward (London) attempt a chip&chase kick v Wigan on Sat. Didn't come to anything but intent was there. - He's got previous that lad as well.
@Philb1985 - Members setting up other members for tries at Hull KR - Deary me today
@JonnyStone - Peacock white boots - There is a trend here.
Anyway, the one story that sent the twitter into meltdown was the disgraceful scenes that were witnessed at Wheldon Road last weekend. So, thank you to @jourdmart (twice) and @ChrisIrvine and all the others who have brought this matter to our attention. Mitchell Sargent, whilst wearing white boots may we add, has kicked the ball across field to set up a try for some fancy dan centre. This is bordering on criminal, it was even mentioned by Hall of Famer Mr Barrie McDermott on that there SKY TV that Sargent should have a cheque in the post for us. Well, it hasn't dropped on the mat yet.
The Hon Chairman also did a bit of moonlighting last weekend as well. FInd out more here.
Once again, we'd like to thank everyone for their efforts in helping out the Union. We appreciate your support.
Just one more thing before we leave it for this week. We get messages from members of the union asking for clarification on a number of issues related to prop forwardry and, while we endeavour to answer them all, time dictates that we can't. If you're unsure, there's a simple mantra to recall which should see you straight: WWBHD, that's 'what would Brendan Hill do'. Stick to that and you won't be too far off, we reckon.
Here endeth the address.
Thanking you kindly.