Now then. Lots to do, so let's crack on.
The Leeds v Wakefield game was particularly disturbing. Leeds named Ian Kirke at prop without proper clearance, fees or registration documents. In play, Greg Eastwood also stuck his head in where it wasn't warranted and, more disturbingly, one of our spotters seems to think Paul Johnson did likewise for Wakefield. Video evidence wasn't conclusive, but the consequences of having a man formerly named international BACK of the year putting his head in the space reserved for membership would of course be dire. The case continues.
Joel Clinton, step forward for a ritual humiliation. Started on by a cheeky half-back - a cheeky French half-back in fact, which probably makes it worse - Mr Clinton summarily failed to lamp him. For shame. Hang your head. A stiff breeze looks like it'd blow Tony Gigot over, yet Mr Clinton couldn't/wouldn't.
James Graham, on the other hand, gets only praise rather than brickbats. His clash of heads a couple of weeks ago with Clint Newton - a second rower masquerading as a fancy-dan centre - saw only one of them staggering about like Bambi on ice, and it wasn't the ginger scouser. A good prop needs a solid melon and Mr Graham certainly has that.
Needless to say, boots remain a top priority, but we're going for a different tack. Instead of the stick, we'll use a carrot and praise those who didn't transgress. Jérome Guisset's were splendid, joining the list of veterans who are leading the way on this issue while Nick Scruton is giving the youngsters a good name. Unlike, that is, the following list of offenders and transgressors:
Serial offender Craig Huby
Luke Burgess failed to heed warnings and got injured whilst wearing a pair of white boots. If that doesn't teach the lad, what will?
The McCarthy-Scarsbrook case saw a point raised on that there Twitter by none other than Angela Powers of Sky Sports fame. "Being a cockney, is there a special dispensation?" she asks. Well I think we all know the answer to that: is there buggery. White footwear might look the part when you're dressed as a pearly king and doing the Lambeth Walk, perhaps even whilst having a banana, but it's not suitable for packing down in the front row.
Finally, when we heard that the Times had taken an interest, we assumed the South Yorkshire Times had got wind of things following the excoriation (thank you, word of the day toilet paper) of Mitchell Stringer a few weeks ago, but no. The actual Times carried a piece by Chris Irvine in praise of the union. Thanking you kindly young sir. Your support is appreciated.